The Story of the “Perfect Day”
By karen | March 12, 2007
There was a time in my life when I was lost, really, really lost. Not lost in the sense that I didn’t know where I was going but lost in the sense that my life was not what I wanted it to be. Not only was it not what I wanted it to be, it was not even headed in the right direction. This was before my younger children were born, before I started writing, before I honored myself enough to at least try to do some of the things I wanted to do with my life. It all started when I was a single mom, afraid of everything.
At that time I lived in fear, fear of paying for this, fear of not enough, just fear. I worked hard. I worked very hard. I didn’t have much to show for it.
It took some time and a great deal of self-reflection but now I no longer feel lost. I can also look back at some things that contributed to the lost feelings.
One thing that comes to my mind is actually an excellent exercise for defining your life. But when I first heard about it, it was presented in such a ludicrous manner that I felt compelled to dismiss it because I had such negative associations with it. Now I can see how it can be a really wonderful tool for creating the life you want.
A real estate sales trainer that I used to listen to recommended that we do an exercise called “The Perfect Day”. The point is to write down what your perfect day looks like and try to follow it everyday. This exercise has an incredible potential to really be of value but when it was presented the real estate sales trainer was just using it as a way to bully us into buying more of his stuff and using his systems.
He gave us all an example of “The Perfect Day”. Of course, it was geared towards a successful real estate agent who used his ideas and his systems for success. His ideas and strategies were cold-calling and knocking on doors. I’m not sure what his strategy is now since the “do not call” list is in effect but at that time in the early 90’s that was his strategy.
So the “Perfect Day” example came from one of his disciples, a woman who made about a bazillion dollars a year selling real estate (okay, I exaggerate. But she was over $1,000,000.00 a year, which for a real estate agent is definitely in the upper echelons). Her perfect day looked something like this:
5:45 am Wake up
5:50 am Workout at the Gym
6:30 am Sales meeting with staff
7:30 am Call expired listings
8:30 am to 12:30 pm Make cold calls
12:30 pm to 2:00 pm Knock on doors
2:00 pm to 8:00 pm Go on Listing Appts
8:00 pm to 9:00 pm follow up calls at office
9:30 pm home
I’m not kidding. This is what we were supposed to aspire to. But all my brain wanted to do was argue with it.
For one thing it took me longer than 5 minutes to wake up, get dressed and get to the gym. I tended to want to work out for longer than 40 minutes and for some reason it seemed important to me to take a shower before hitting the office. But if she could wake up, get to the gym, workout, take a shower, get dressed and still be on time for sales meeting in just 45 minutes, Okay.
But then I had a problem with eating too. She never scheduled in any eating time. Now I actually met her (even spent a day with her which wasn’t “perfect” by the way) and she probably weighed about 110 lbs. with a soaking wet business suit on, so perhaps she didn’t eat. Okay.
But then I had a problem with the family time. She had a teenage daughter who was quite troubled and a husband that she never knew but they weren’t important to her because she was making over a million a year selling real estate.
But that didn’t work for me. I had just found and married the Love of my Life. I wanted to spend time with him. I had always had a wonderful relationship with my son. I wanted to continue having that so I wanted to spend time with him, too. And in the deep recesses of my heart I knew one of my real dreams was to have more children. Her “perfect” and my “perfect” were not even close.
If I was going to plan a “Perfect Day” I wanted to include a little LIFE in it and not just work.
So I actually resisted this exercise. I refused to acknowledge the value of this exercise for many years. I had a negative association, a very negative association.
But now I can see the potential of this exercise. I no longer have conflicting emotions about it because now I will create my own “Perfect Day” for my real goals and aspirations. I can create the idea of the “Perfect Day” according to what I truly want out of life not what I think I have to do because I have no other choice but what I really, truly want out of my life.
My “Perfect Day” can now be an incredible, self-empowering, masterpiece that will help me create the life of my dreams.
I’ll share it with you another day.
You do need a reason to come back. Don’t you?
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Topics: Living the Power, Personal Development |
March 28th, 2007 at 12:24 pm
[...] This book has also clarified something else for me. A few weeks ago, I wrote about an exercise called “the Perfect Day”. As I have been considering and thinking of this exercise I have found that I have a high level of resistance to actually blocking out measures of time. I can absolutely visualize (that is one of my strong suits, I can always see it in my brain) what I want and how my perfect day is, yet I tend to lean towards the more fluid and adaptable schedule rather than a structured day. I have always been like that. Many years ago I left a structured job to have the freedom of self-employment so this is something I know. I have decided to honor this about myself and to think of it as a good thing. If creativity and inspiration strike me at whatever hour I want to act on it then. I personally do not want to have a structured plan. So rather than structure in my Perfect day I have made my perfect day with inclusions. Certain things are included in every day. The time I do them can vary. [...]
July 29th, 2007 at 1:13 pm
Creating your own perfect day is a great idea. I can see why you were resistant though, her perfect day seems more like a perfect nightmare.
I guess the key is to make sure it is what you want, not what someone else does.
August 31st, 2007 at 11:55 am
[...] Quite a few years back, in my previous life as a Realtor, I spent the (perfect) day with a very successful Realtor from a neighboring state. I commented on her cute shoes and she retorted that “they should be cute because they cost me over $3500.00.” My eyes must have gotten wide or something because she went on to explain that the reason why they cost her so much is because she “skipped out on work” to go shopping for them. And I’m thinking “what? are we in 7th grade again, getting in trouble for sluffing?”. But of course, she was making about 10 times as much as I was, so what did I know. [...]