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Flowing Self-Discipline
By karen | June 25, 2007
Life often takes discipline.
Self-discipline.
But there is a difference between “self-discipline” and “self-discipline”.
Okay, I know that it sounds as if I said the same words and I did. I need to clarify that.
There is a difference between “struggling” self-discipline and “flowing” self-discipline.
Believe me, I have experienced both and there is a difference, a huge difference.
I tend to be the neurotic, disciplined, perfectionist type. It is not one of my best qualities but it is not one of my worst qualities either. The problems with it always arose when I would get stuck in the struggling self-discipline. I would spend days, weeks, months doing something that I absolutely detested because I committed to do it. The problem with that is that eventually I would have a breakdown, where the crying jags would take over and I would be drowning in a sea of tears, hiding in my closet for entire days. I would do my best to recover and then I would be back at it again, because after all I was “self-disciplined” but my energies were burnt and my emotions were on edge.
I was stuck in struggling self-discipline. I hated what I was doing but I always kept the promises that I made because I was that neurotic, disciplined, perfectionist type and I had self-discipline.
I never really accomplished the huge goals. Sure I eeked out a life. It wasn’t even close to what I wanted and I was creating a whole host of things that were not part of the package of my envisioned ideal life but I had that self-discipline and I made those promises. Now I know why it didn’t work out the way I thought it should.
It is because Life was never meant to be a struggle.
I have learned that self-discipline does not necessarily have to be hard and it doesn’t have to hurt.
Self-discipline is not synonymous with pain.
I suppose one could say that it takes self-discipline to write on a blog consistently. It does. It takes self-discipline to sit down and write everyday but for me the self-discipline in this case is a flowing self-discipline.
I enjoy it. I love it. I find joy and fun in writing. I love to write. So even though I could be swimming at the pool or playing at the park or watching a movie, (or right now I could be sleeping, should be sleeping!) or any number of other things, more often than not I am at my computer writing. I write because I love it.
So I consistently write everyday.
Does that mean I am self-disciplined? Yes.
Is it difficult? Is it a struggle? Do I hate it? No! On the contrary, I love it!
We’ve all heard the term “struggling artist”. I am going to surmise that the only reason a “struggling artist” is struggling is because of finances. A true artist does not struggle to create their art. It is a flow and a joy and a pleasure. Grass doesn’t struggle to grow. A flower doesn’t struggle to bloom. Any great artist of any calling will tell you that they love to create their art. They have self-discipline. It takes time to learn their craft. They have to be disciplined with their days and their time and use it wisely to create their masterpieces but the truly great artists never struggle with their creations.
And it is the same with great scientists, doctors, lawyers, musicians, butchers and bakers and candlestick makers.
When you love what you are doing the self-discipline becomes a flow. It’s not a struggle. It doesn’t have to be. It’s not meant to be. It shouldn’t be.
So like I said there is a difference between self-discipline and self-discipline. When you give up the struggle the self-discipline is easy. You go with the flow and it carries you. You are happier and your life has more Joy!
And who knows, the money may follow too!
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This post is included in the Blog Carnival on Observations on Life July 1, 2007 edition located at Anja Merret.com
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This post is included in the Carnival of Creative Growth, July 15, edition
The carnival is located at Energies of Creation
Popularity: 3% [?]
Topics: Personal Development |
June 25th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
How true this all rang for me. When I am in the middle of a project I’m excited about, things flow, time has no meaning.
I’m getting so old and been through this so many times now, that I am just delightfully “lazy” in that I hardly ever struggle any more. Mostly because, like you, I found it never worked, anyway. I figure what’s going on is what’s going on and part of a cycle and that my wanting to do things again will return.
Great post!! Thanks.
June 25th, 2007 at 1:46 pm
With age comes wisdom! I didn’t have the wisdom to really know this in my 30’s, that is when I was still learning with the struggle! See there are wonderful things about being in your 40’s and over!!
thanks for stopping by Pamm!
June 25th, 2007 at 3:53 pm
God, this is ringing so true for me - right down to the crying jags which I’m having one of right now! My contract ends on 31 July, and I am finding applying for jobs *such* a struggle, I can’t tell you. Something’s not right, and I’m missing the flow.
I’ve ALWAYS done this - whether it’s taking care of others (mostly flow, but can spill over into struggle), or going to church (which is often a struggle) or trying to be perfect, strong and not a burden (struggle!) - you’re so right about it being a way of survival, not living. As Rachel Remen would say, staying a spore rather than allowing oneself to grow and bloom.
This is exactly what I needed NOW. If synchronicity is finding its way into my life, then I can’t be too far from the flow.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Ixx
June 25th, 2007 at 4:35 pm
Wow, I am so grateful that my words were helpful to you! Thank you, thank you for your comment!
June 27th, 2007 at 2:18 am
[…] Keeping up with the principles is probably getting harder because this is still foreign to me. I don’t think that there’s ever been a time in my life that I’ve committed to doing something like this long term and actually kept with it for so long. While this was inspired by Aaron Potts’ offer of a hundred bucks to people who would commit to reaching a goal, I can honestly say that the money doesn’t matter anymore (although I won’t refuse his cash!). While it’s hard, it’s a beautiful kind of hard. I think that Karen expressed it wonderfully in her recent article on self-discipline: “When you love what you are doing the self-discipline becomes a flow. It’s not a struggle. It doesn’t have to be. It’s not meant to be. It shouldn’t be.” […]
July 1st, 2007 at 1:35 pm
[…] Karen Lynch presents Flowing Self-Discipline posted at Live The Power. […]
July 15th, 2007 at 1:35 am
[…] Karen Lynch presents Flowing Self-Discipline posted at LivethePower, saying, “When you Love what you do, while at times it may be a challenge, it is never a painful struggle!” […]
July 27th, 2007 at 4:28 pm
[…] Karen Lynch presents Flowing Self-Discipline posted at LivethePower, saying, “Life was never meant to be a struggle!” […]